Bulletin Board
There are several bulletin boards that can be found in Whispering Rock Psychic Summer Camp. These keep track of current events that change as the story progresses. Raz can interact with them to read the messages posted on the boards. Messages Before Basic Braining *"If you're reading this then you're late for class! Report for Basic Braining immediately to avoid detention in the Geodesic Psychoisolation Chamber. --Coach Oleander." *"Attention: everyone. You should all be aware that Nils Lutfisksic and I have BROKEN UP forever. He is a pig, a child, and a loser, and I don't even care because James Hoofburger is my new boyfriend, and he is a MAN. Sincerely, Elka Doom." *"Children, we all like to tell ghost stories at camp, but please, the horrible stories about the monster that ALLEGEDLY lives in the lake and eats children's brains are getting a little out of hand. Some of the younger children are terrified. So please, keep the stories happy, okay? Love, Milla Vodello." *"Hey Maloof. Message to you from Bobby Zilch: You're dead. Regards, Benny 'The Nose' Fideliosic." *"OFFICIAL NOTICE: Any children caught burning, shooting, tossing, or in anyway harming the squirrels or birds of Whispering Rock will immediately be put in Psychoisolation." *"Levitation Class today, 1:00pm on the floating dock. Instructor: Milla Vodello." *"Subjects wanted for experimentation. Must have above-average tolerance for psychic duress. Permanent damage is not expected, but all participants will be expected to sign a standard waiver of liability. Contact Sasha Nein for details." *"Dear Visitors from Other Galaxies, this is Chloe Barge. I have been receiving your psychic transmissions and am attempting to return communication. I have found a psychic radio and am attempting to retune to transmit to your galaxy. Stand by." After Basic Braining *"Goodbye, cruel camp. I'm tired of being picked on by Bobby and all the mean kids at camp. If I just had one friend here who was nice, then I would stay. But you're all mean and no one stands up for me, so I'm going home. I'll be in the parking lot, waiting for my dad, so if you wanna pick on me one last time, you'd better hurry. --Maloof." *"Just an update for everyone. Nils and I are STILL broken up, and no matter how much he begs, I am not taking him back. Also, you should know that my new boyfriend doesn't like being called J.T. anymore. His real name is James. Sincerely, Elka." *"If anyone talks to the squirrels, they shouldn't listen because the squirrels are a bunch of stupid liars. --Dogen." *"Great deals in the Main Lodge Store! Drop by for great prices on Dream Fluffs, PSI Cores, and more! All available for just a few pieces of Psitanium!" *"BAND PRACTICE TODAY: In the main lodge, the Levitators will be jamming this afternoon. Please come by if you'd like to try out for the band!" *"Warning: If I find out who's been biting holes in the bottom of these canoes, someone is going to get paddled. --Admiral Cruller." *"UPDATE: The Levitators have broken up. However, there will be a practice session of the Firestarters today in the main lodge. We are looking for someone who can play rock flute. Come on by and try out!" *"Lili, if you're looking for me, I'll be down by the lake today. The fish seem a little upset, and I'm going to see what's wrong. But don't worry, I'll still do your homework for tomorrow, if you want. --Elton Fir." *"Security cameras have been installed, and the next kid who jumps on my car is going to be very, very sorry. --Coach Oleander." *"Hey, Clem and I just wanted to say that everyone did great in Basic Braining today! Give yourselves a hand! Woooo! Love Crystal!" *"And I just wanted to say Ditto to that! Double Ditto, in fact. Your friend, Clem." *"And I just wanted to point out, in case you didn't know, that Crystal's last name was Snagrash. Crystal Flowers Snagrash! No joke! --Bobby Z." *"Vernon, Franke totally has a crush on you. She is warm for your form. Signed, Anonymous." *"Warning: The abandoned mental institution across the lake is not Psychonauts property, and not safe for children. Canoe access has been blocked off. But please, for your own safety, children, do not try to find another route. Love, Milla." *"Hey, if anyone sees Franke, could you please tell her I'll be waiting for her by Make Out Cave. --Vernon." *"Greetings, pan-galactic travelers. I am currently developing a new vehicle for intergalactic travel. Flight tests are being performed at a remote location in the woods. Hope to soon be visiting you in person. Thanks for the messages. --Chloe." After Sasha's Shooting Gallery *"Has anyone seen Dogen Boole? He didn't show up for band practice, and I'm a little worried about him. --Phoebe." *"LEVITATION CLASS STARTING NOW! Please report to the floating dock immediately! Don't be late for the party, children. Love, Milla." *"NOTICE: I have retained the services of Mikhail Bulgakov as my personal bodyguard. Anyone wishing to do harm to my person is requested to speak to Mikhail first, so he can pummel you into the ground. Sincerely, Maloof." *"Hey, if anyone sees Vernon waiting for me down by Make Out Cave, could you make out with him yourself, because I'm not interested. --Franke." *"Dear Alien voices, spaceship flight tests were fruitful, but I need more data on triple-light-speed travel. I am building a super antenna to receive data, and placing it as high as possible. Please transmit data in T-minus two hours. --Chloe." *"Shootin' lessons today at the ol' target range by the main lodge. Come on by and let ol' J.T. show you a thing or two." After Milla's Dance Party *"Lili, I'm sorry if this hurts you, but you should know. Milka and I have fallen in love. I don't know how it happened. Does anyone ever really know? The heart wants what it wants. Friends, Elton. P.S. I have your last homework assignment. If you want to meet me some time, I can give it to you." *"Lili, if you want your last homework assignment, you can find it at the bottom of Lake Oblongata, where I put it. Which is where I'll put you and those hoes Franke and Kitty, if you ever mess with Elton again. Understood? --Milka." *"Hey, has anyone seen Kitty? She went down to the beach for a swim and hasn't come back. If you see her, please tell her I'm down in the woods by the lake looking for her. --Franke." *"Alien visitors, please be advised that I have discovered bizarre alien life on home planet and need to investigate before traveling to your galaxy. The subject has grotesque calcium protrusions in the mouth area, and a pronounced hair-like tumor on top of his head. Definitely an ambassador from another galaxy. Will resume communication once the subject has been isolated. --Chloe." *"Story Time this afternoon! Gifted storyteller Vernon Tripe will be thrilling audiences in the TV lounge this afternoon with his gripping tales. Come early to make sure you get a good seat!" *"My Russian associate and I are pleased to announce that our protection services are now available to the public on a contractual basis. So if you're getting grief from a bully or a thug, come see Maloof and Mikhail. Protection is our business." *"Okay, we tried to spread cheer all over camp, but once again this year we were met with meanness and cruelty. So I'm sorry to say this is the end. Crystal and I are taking measures to make sure we never get teased again. You will all be very, very sorry. Goodbye. --Clem Foote." *"Ad P.S. Do not come near the roof of the main lodge any time soon, because our plan is secret and you can't stop us anyway. --Crystal." During nighttime *"Children, Sasha and I must leave immediately on official Psychonauts business. Please talk to Coach Oleander if you have any problems. We should be back very soon. Do not be afraid. --Milla." *"Hey, has anyone seen Franke? We were hanging out in the TV lounge and I got up to go to the bathroom, and when I came back, everybody was gone. I know they wouldn't normally leave in the middle of a story, so I'm a little worried. Tell them I'm out looking for them if you see them, okay? --Vernon." *"Chops, buddy, if you read this I just wanted to say I'm sorry for letting my head get turned around by a fast-talkin' filly who, when it comes down to it, is duller than ditch water and half as deep. So I'm at the regular practice spot in the woods if you still want to be friends. Your ol' pal, J.T." *"Nils! Oh, Nils. I was such a fool. You know that you and I are meant to be together. I mean, I can see the future, so I've known it all along. I'm coming to find you, little Honey Bear! Then we can be together again. --Elka." *"J.T., I checked the usual spot but couldn't find ya! I'm going to try the back woods next, hombre. --Chops." *"Anyone seen Milka, who I am totally dating now? I know she's invisible most of the time, but this time she's really gone. Please let her know I'm looking for her. --Elton." *"Okay, that does it. I've been looking for people to bully for HOURS and I can't find ANYONE. Is this some kind of practical joke, you guys? NOT FUNNY. Where did everybody go? --Benny." References Category:Psychonauts (game)